How to Prepare to Buy a Home: Lessons I Learned the Hard Way

Buying a home sounds exciting, right? And it is. But if I’m being brutally honest, the preparation stage nearly broke me. I thought it was just about saving money and picking a cute little house with a white fence. Oh boy, was I wrong. There are credit scores to wrangle, budgets to tighten, and emotions that will make you feel like you’re on a roller coaster that doesn’t end.

If you’re here, you’re probably wondering: “What exactly should I do before buying a home?” I’ve been through it, messed up a bunch of times, and came out on the other side. So let me share my own journey with you—the good, the bad, and the “wish I’d known that sooner” moments.

Step 1: Get Real With Your Finances

The first big wake-up call I had was when I sat down to see if I could actually afford a house. Spoiler: I couldn’t, not at first. I had been casually browsing Zillow at night, falling in love with kitchens that had marble countertops and backyards big enough for a dog I didn’t even own yet.

But when I ran the numbers, reality hit hard. I had credit card debt, a student loan still hanging over me, and only a tiny savings account that could barely cover an emergency. That’s when I realized the preparation part is really about financial honesty.

Here’s what I did (and what I recommend):

• Check your credit score. I logged into a free credit monitoring app and almost spit out my coffee. My score was… let’s just say “not lender-friendly.” If your score is under 680, most traditional lenders will raise their eyebrows.
• Track every expense. For one month, I wrote down everything I spent money on. Every latte, every late-night snack run, even that impulse Amazon purchase. It was ugly, but it helped me see where my money was actually going.
• Cut the fluff. I didn’t stop living, but I did cut down on the random subscriptions I wasn’t using. Bye-bye, streaming service number four.

It’s humbling, but you need this step. A lender will tear through your financials anyway, so you might as well beat them to it.

Step 2: Build Your Emergency Fund First

Here’s something I didn’t do soon enough: create an emergency fund. I thought, “Once I buy a house, I’ll just start saving for emergencies.” Wrong move.

Within the first three months of homeownership, the water heater died. That repair cost me $1,200. If I hadn’t had a small cushion in savings, I would’ve been charging it to a credit card at 20% interest. That’s not the vibe.

My advice? Before even thinking about a down payment, save at least three to six months of expenses in a separate savings account. Think of it as your safety net. Life doesn’t stop throwing curveballs just because you’ve got new house keys.

Step 3: Save Aggressively (But Realistically) for a Down Payment

Saving for a down payment was the hardest part for me. It felt like climbing a mountain where the peak kept moving farther away.

At first, I told myself I’d save 20%. That’s the magic number to avoid private mortgage insurance (PMI), right? But in my market, 20% of the homes I liked was basically the price of a small car. So I adjusted.

Here’s what I did:

• Automated savings. I set up a separate savings account just for my down payment and made automatic transfers each payday. I pretended the money didn’t exist.
• Side hustles. I started freelancing on weekends and put every extra dollar straight into the house fund. Honestly, watching that account grow gave me a weird rush.
• Be flexible with the percentage. I ended up putting down 10%. Yes, I pay PMI, but it allowed me to get into a home sooner without draining my entire savings.

The lesson? Don’t let the “perfect” 20% goal paralyze you. Work with what’s realistic in your situation.

Step 4: Understand Your Debt-to-Income Ratio (DTI)

Nobody told me about this until a lender brought it up. Your debt-to-income ratio is basically how much debt you have compared to how much money you make each month. Lenders use it to decide if you can handle a mortgage.

I’ll be honest: mine was bad at first. Between student loans and a car payment, my ratio was way too high. So I made some tough calls. I paid off my car loan aggressively, even though I loved that car. Sacrificing it gave me breathing room in my DTI, and that’s what finally made me look attractive to lenders.

If you want to prepare properly, figure out your DTI early. The lower it is, the better.

Step 5: Get Pre-Approved (Not Just Pre-Qualified)

Here’s a mistake I made: I bragged to friends that I was “pre-qualified.” Thought I was hot stuff. But pre-qualification is just a quick guess based on your stated income—it doesn’t mean much when you start shopping seriously.

Pre-approval, on the other hand, is gold. That’s when a lender actually verifies your documents, checks your credit, and tells you exactly how much they’ll lend. When I finally got pre-approved, it made the home search feel more real. Plus, sellers took me more seriously.

Pro tip: shop around for pre-approvals with multiple lenders. Different lenders have different rates, and even a 0.5% difference can save you thousands over the life of a loan.

Step 6: Make a “Hidden Costs” Budget

This was the biggest shocker for me: the down payment isn’t the only big expense. There are closing costs (about 2–5% of the purchase price), moving costs, inspection fees, and random things like buying a lawnmower because suddenly you have grass to take care of.

When I bought my house, I forgot to budget for furniture. I moved in with one couch, a mattress on the floor, and a folding table I used as a dining setup for months. Not exactly Instagram-worthy.

So if I could go back, I’d create a “hidden costs” budget. Even just setting aside a few thousand dollars for those expenses makes the process smoother.

Step 7: Research the Market (Like a Detective)

When I first started looking at houses, I had no idea what was a good deal and what was overpriced. I just went by “Oh, that kitchen looks nice.” Rookie mistake.

The turning point was when I started tracking the housing market like it was my favorite TV show. I followed listing prices, noticed which homes sold quickly, and compared similar properties across neighborhoods. Over time, I could spot when a house was a bargain or when it was a trap.

If you’re preparing to buy, spend a few months stalking listings in your area. Get a feel for price per square foot, average days on market, and which neighborhoods are hot. Knowledge is power here.

Step 8: Don’t Forget Lifestyle Fit

This might sound silly, but one of the biggest mistakes I almost made was focusing too much on the house and not enough on the lifestyle around it. I once fell in love with a place that had the perfect kitchen, only to realize it was a 90-minute commute to work. Nope.

Ask yourself:

• How close is it to work or school?
• What’s traffic like during rush hour?
• Are there grocery stores, parks, or coffee shops nearby?
• Do you actually like the neighborhood vibe?

Buying a house isn’t just about the property. It’s about how it fits your day-to-day life.

Step 9: Be Patient (But Ready to Act Fast)

Here’s the contradiction: you need patience, but also speed. When I first started, I wanted to rush into the first home that felt “good enough.” Later, when I learned more, I dragged my feet too long and lost out on a great place.

What I eventually realized is you need to be patient with the process—don’t settle for a house that doesn’t work—but when the right one shows up, you’ve got to move quickly. That’s where preparation (pre-approval, savings, research) pays off.

Step 10: Don’t Go It Alone

I tried to be a lone wolf at first, thinking I could handle it all. Big mistake. Having a good real estate agent changed everything for me. They helped me spot red flags during tours, guided me through paperwork I didn’t understand, and even negotiated the price down by $8,000.

If you’re serious about buying, find an agent you trust. Ask friends for referrals, read reviews, and don’t be afraid to interview a couple before choosing.

Final Thoughts: Preparing Is the Hard Part, But It Pays Off

Looking back, preparing to buy a home was harder than actually signing the papers. It took me almost two years from the moment I decided to buy to the day I got the keys. But that prep work saved me from making mistakes that could’ve cost me tens of thousands.

So if you’re in the early stages, don’t get discouraged. Focus on your finances, build your savings, and take it step by step. There will be setbacks—I had plenty—but every bit of effort makes the final moment of walking into your new home that much sweeter.

FAQs About Preparing to Buy a Home

1. How long should I prepare before buying a house?
   It depends on your finances. Some people need a few months to get ready, while others (like me) needed a couple of years. On average, give yourself at least 12 months.
2. Do I really need 20% down?
   Not necessarily. While 20% helps you avoid PMI, many buyers put down 5–10% and still get good deals. It’s about balancing affordability with financial safety.
3. What credit score do I need to buy a home?
   Most conventional loans require at least 620, but the higher your score, the better your rate. Aim for 680+ if you can.
4. Should I pay off debt before buying a home?
   Yes, especially high-interest debt. Lowering your DTI makes you more attractive to lenders and gives you more breathing room in your budget.
5. What are closing costs?
   Closing costs are the fees you pay when finalizing the mortgage. They include things like appraisal, title insurance, and attorney fees. Expect 2–5% of the home’s purchase price.
6. Is buying a fixer-upper a good idea for first-time buyers?
   It can be, but only if you’re handy or have the budget to hire contractors. A fixer-upper might look like a bargain, but hidden repairs can drain your wallet fast.
7. Should I buy a house or keep renting?
   If your finances aren’t stable or you’re unsure about staying in the same city for at least 5 years, renting might be smarter. Buying makes sense when you’re financially ready and see yourself staying put.